A life filled with love and a love filled with life…

By On · 27 Comments · In blog

March 2011  An group e-mail sent out from Andy ….

Hello lovely friends! We are tapping out this message from level 7 west 1, which is not a luxury room, in some fabulous hotel, unfortunately but is in fact back in the all to familiar curtained walls of the hospital. Today we found out that the previous new round of chemo was still not either strong enough or clever enough to keep up with this cunning and relentless lymphoma. So here we are back to the medical drawing board of looking at weapons of mass chemo destruction, that will beat this little fucker once and for all! The future is still bright and there are still options and my 40th birthday this Oct will not be spent with me wearing a party hat on my bald head with one goddamn balloon!!! So what do I need? I need you all my dear friends to help keep me in the loop of life, energy, news, creativity, bad jokes, positive vibes, energy and love. Stories, ideas, scripts, e mail, texts etc. Let’s stay connected as I role up my sleeves yet again to overcome this UFC battle of my own. I am okay but right now I do need some big strong voices in my corner. All my love Andy x x x

After seeing an exciting, new path so clearly on the horizon, the Universe, yet again, harshly revealed to us, the importance of learning to create in the moment, again and again and again. When you are thrown into a tornado and all that you have is dealing with the moment, everything else falls away, other than the opportunity to choose what is most important to YOU.

Tomorrow I will turn 39 years old and in truth, apart from the obvious I have never felt more inspired, more determined and more alive, than ever before. Loosing Andy has taught me more than I could possibly imagine, but the one most signifcant gift, the lesson and legacy he left with me, is to seize every possible moment passionately, by the balls and squeeze ‘em hard! (Sorry guys no offense!)

So in the words of a very wise man, then re- scripted into the words of a wise Turtle,

 ‘The past is history, the future is a mystery and today is a gift that is why we call it the Present.’ Kung Fu Panda

 

 

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  • Sally T.

    So many loved ones who wanted nothing more than more time. I share your sentiment, Vashti. We owe it to Andy and countless others to live a full, loving life. Great post.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=818507821 Patricia J Tibbits

    Thank you for sharing this…Seeing & reading words from Andy, then what you wrote, is what makes me look at life n a new way and live it to the fullest no matter how dark my life may be at the moment or how clear it is…I am not going to dwell on the days that are dark, or be scared of what is to come, because it has not gotten here yet.. I am just going to LIVE IN THE MOMENT NOW!! Outstanding post…Thank you. Patti xx

  • Dilyana Konstantinova

    Beautiful words written by so strong and beautiful woman.

  • Lisbmari

    You are a strong and wise woman Vashti. Thank you so much for sharing this.

  • http://twitter.com/RalucaEftimie Raluca Eftimie

    So sad, and at the same time SO inspiring.

     Vashti, what day was Andy’s birthday on, in October, if you don’t mind sharing?

    xxx

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1469100129 Kylie Scott

    Inspiring

  • http://www.facebook.com/RaverWithAHardstyleFlavour George Hart

    thank you for sharing this, it makes me happy to see Andy was never going to give up even when things were most dark, it makes me want to live a full life for people like andy that were taken away from the world they made brighter too soon… thank you 

  • Rebecca

    I remember this email… I bawled my eyes out and felt incredibly inspired all at the same time. Andy’s words, his honesty and humour were a wonderful lesson for me. The vision you both held, moment by moment, and the sharing of this with loved ones was a gift for us too. x

  • llahrd

    iv always said that Andy was a true champion on and off the screen…hoping you have a great birthday vashti…im sure the kids will be on their excellent behaviour for this special day…well one would hope…lol…x

  • sandra james

    still cant get the hang of this…the last comment was from me….lol

  • Irenemahon

    hi vashti first of all happy birthday for tomorrow (my grandsons birthday to) all of andy s fans just knew he would fight to the end …in the words of the queens song …he was a true champion…..he won our hearts…we are still numb from he s passing i know i am ….i must be one of andy s oldest fans (61)…but that did nt stop me from admiring him as an actor a beloved son and amazing husband and a loving father ……i used to send messages to andy via aka andy whitfield fan page …i used to hope if ever he see them it would give him hope and encouragement …but the bastard big C beat him …..he was special before but even more so now ……i have all things andy surrounding me it gives me comfort (my husband is very understanding lol )….so here s to a happy future for you and your jesse red and indigo sky …Andy will always be with you ..he could nt had left he s babies in more loving capable hands then yours ….you are an amazing increadable beautiful woman then you vashti Andy will always be with me because i have a tattoo of andy on my right shoulder in tribute ….all my love and the biggest of hugs for you and the beautiful babies ….irene….xxxxxxxx

  • Susi b

    The day after you were born …..the pure white baby-suit was just too, well, plain for my soaring emotions;  so sitting amonst the ferns and foxgloves that were so much a part of both your and Andy’s childhoods, I stitched on an embroidered badge which read  ‘this is the first day of the rest of your life’.  Here’s to another year of living it to the full, as Andy did and would always want you to do

  • Beth Forrester

    What a beautiful and positive message Andy sent out to your friends, there was still so much hope! All I have to say is F**K CANCER! (sorry, had to get it out!)

    Seeing countless people pass much before they should have has made me realize how important it is to savor everyday! Life is uncertain, and tomorrow is not promised……I will continue to use your words of inspiration to motivate me to push myself to do what I want & continue to follow my dreams! Thanks again Vashti, I really look forward to your blog! xx

  • Jennifer M.

    My heart still breaks when I read your posts about Andy and what a wonderful human he was, and the cruelty of life…and although I have learned these very life lessons you blog about everyday at the ripe old age of 21 when my mother passed away after 4 years of battling cancer, I sometimes forget them when I see my father’s Alzheimer’s getting a little worse everyday. I get overwhelmed with what the future holds, but then I read your blog and it always reminds that happiness is in instances in your day, when you hear your favourite song on the radio on your way to driving the kids to school, when you have the first sip of coffee in the morning, or when you have had a just plain uneventful day when you can lay your head down on your pillow at night and know that everyone you love is safe and healthy…As my father always says: ONE DAY AT A TIME

  • Sarah

    Vashti thank you so much for making me see. When my aunt died of cancer I always thought f how unfair it was and what impact she could have on my life when she would have been around longer but now you make me see that is more important to realize how lucky I was to know her and being grateful for the time i coud spent with her. It’s the same with other people who died or with whom I drifted apart.
    You have so much life in you. Thank you for sharing this :)

  • Pam Stewart

    Words and action to live by indeed!  Thank you Vashti for sharing this with us.  Very heartfelt and precious…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Natënemirë-Shumëimirë/100002402616886 Natënemirë Shumëimirë

    the pain will never shrink. Our heart have to grow to be able to carry the hurt on our shoulders until we have learn to change the pain into wings and fly away into the world-soul.
    I lost my child I can imagine your bereavement. I am so sorry for you.
    God bless you and your children. I feel with you.
    Sabrina Pfeifer, Germany
     

  • Julie Morrison

    Thank you for sharing. You are a very special lady, hope you have a very special birthday. Lots of love to you and to and your lovely kids.

  • Alexiscarril

    Thanks so much for sharing Andy’s words and your wisdom!

  • Simo P

    Dear Vashti I follow you for quite some time. I hoped so much you write a post with the words and feelings of Andy. It never happened to try so many emotions for a person who i have never known. Andy has fought strenuously an enormous parasite that tortured him until the end. Andy still lives in people who have loved, esteemed, admired …. Look at how many people still speak of him. Andy would have expected similar success? It ‘a magnificent thing: one person in his short life has succeeded in raising beautiful emotions without being a prophet, a missionary or whatever. He alone with her obvious beauty, simplicity, charisma and talent has aroused our more recondite feelings. You’re a strong woman, realistic and full of life. The pain slowly will decrease. Have you met a wonderful person; your heart  is still full of love for him . The turtle find the right words. My grandfather instead always told me: You should always look ahead. Happy birthday Vashti. Much love. Simo

  • http://twitter.com/PennyDouglas Penny Douglas

    Happy Birthday Vashti! May you have a wonderful one and I send you and the children my love and blessings!! xoxoxo huge hugs!!

  • Queen

    Hi Vashti,  Wishing you a very Happy Birthday. It’s your special day yet we fans and followers of your blog are the ones who are receiving the gift. The gift of Andy’s words. Thank you so much for sharing.  

  • Oblaedchen

    Hallo vashti, one question please: I read, that Andys birthday is in july, isn’t it ? I wondered, that in the e-mail he wrote, that his birthday is in october. Please tell me, when is Andys birthday (to know, when I have to send him wishes to the sky :-) ), Thanks for answer, Annett

  • Trina

    Thank you for that Vashti. One question though after reading Andy’s letter, he said his birthday is in October unless I misunderstood and I always thought it was in July.

  • Dontmess873

    Your strength inspires me – trying to make every day count is NOT an easy task! Keep riding strong!
    And always, always let the wisdom of Master Oogway be your guide :-) Happy birthday!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1273337870 Lori Kay Blake-Leighton

    XO

  • Sabrina

    such a wonderful man!