With Mother’s Day quickly approaching here in Australia, as well as in several other countries around the world, my thoughts turn to my own mother who has just recently turned 70. It seems improbable that the sassy, highly intelligent, super creative, sexy, pioneering-macrobiotic-shop-owning woman that I remember as my mum, is now solidly planted at decade seven in her life! And instead of striding briskly down the street in her eighties-tastic espadrilles like she used to, is now yielding a Gandalf-like staff (which, in truth, it’s more like a stolen single ski which I wouldn’t put past her) for support as she slowly navigates her voluptuous Renoiresque shape, favoring a tender knee.

I often think back to the intensity of our relationship and the extraordinary friendship we enjoyed, usually taken a little too far by my over-sharing, which I’m sure does not surprise you. We were such an incredible part of each other’s lives back then but somehow, and maybe somewhat inevitably through life, love and loss, I drifted away….
During my Andy’s illness and the latter part of his journey a few months before he passed, remembering that our families live in the UK and we in Australia, Andy’s mother arrived to help for a short while. Three months later, through some of the most incredible shared experiences, she, we and I said goodbye to her son. It is, and was, for her, heartbreaking, soul-destroying and something that she, we or most of us could never imagine having to do. Yet somehow, this unimaginable, almost surreal sequence in our lives saw the extraordinary coming together of two women and mothers who collectively shared and facilitated the life cycle of this beautiful boy, man, father and son.
There are, and always will be, the most extraordinary and unimaginable sacrifices we make as mummies: letting our children go, by far, being one of the hardest. Whether it is physically or emotionally watching our children stumble and fall, fly and succeed, resent and resist or silently sleep (or sometimes slip) away, we can but do our best in any moment. There are no definitive guidebooks for sure, and most days, no pats on the back, no bonus marks for the most sleepless nights, and no lanes to stay confidently inside as we tackle probably the most arduous and far-reaching challenge there is: raising children. We are all just doing our best in any given moment.

So to all you mothers and mother figures in the world, and to all the amazing women who fill those roles in your life: Celebrate the mother that you have and that you are: the incredible human being that realises how to share, care and bare herself in a way that facilitates another human being to grow and experience a life filled with love and love filled with life.

Nothing but love to you amazing community and thank you once again for your patience as I navigate how best to share the juicy life lessons that abundantly come my way, whether I like or not!

 

  • Laz

    A mother’s love is something indescribable, even when you loose her, something is missing forever that the way I feel since mine passed away a few years back, today I’m a mother of a beautiful boy which is my best creation and joy in my life. mother’s day is every day for me and I believed, that is best job on the universe , my heart goes with all the mothers, daughters and son than today they don’t have each other , but life is one and it’s important to keep the memories alive of the ones we love and enjoy what we have today. another great post dear Vasti , you are not alone, my best regards for Andy’s mun and yours. kisses for jesse and indi. thank very much.
    lot of loves.

  • michelbarreau

    je vous souhaite que de belles choses vous le meritez tant bisous a vous trois de france

  • Malin

    As a mother, a daughter, a wife and a woman who just wants to live her life a little different, i want you to share this kind of “beautiful sound of life” with me.

    XXX
    Malin

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0BAj8hyTO8

  • Juliana Choe

    Cheers to you Vashti!!!! An amazing mom and a great role model to two beautiful children! As always so beautifully written!! XO

  • raghav

    dear ma’am , i am waiting to watch the documentary film of the legend fighting against lymphoma… the film “be here now” … when is it released?

    • Sally T.

      Be Here Now is in postproduction and the release date has not yet been announced. For updates on the film’s progress, check http://www.beherenowfilm.com.

  • Stephen

    Happy Mother’s Day to you Vashti, Andy’s mother, and your mother. I always think of my mother and miss both my mother and father every day. I can’t celebrate mother’s day without my father, nor father’s day without my mother. You are an inspirational woman and incredible mom. Best always. Stephen